Q: Why does it take so long for my toddler to learn what’s OK and what isn’t? - Sarah

A: Life is full of rules and expectations and young children are constantly having to learn those from us. And it takes a long time! But understanding and appreciating how children learn and their capacity for learning can help build a strong, trusting partnership with your child.

It’s not easy to be with toddlers. On a recent Pikler training in Budapest, we had a lecture on ‘expressing and communicating rules and habits’ from Anna Tardos, child psychologist, and former president of the Hungarian Pikler-Lóczy Association. In her nineties, she’s still teaching, and it’s always a privilege to hear her speak. She pointed out something really important about how many rules we must learn as we transition out of infancy.

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